Attachment Parenting: How Does It Work?

When looking for a solution to many contemporary problems related to relationships and the upbringing of our children, or the lack of emotional bond with their parents, you can meet the idea of ​​upbringing in closeness in parenthood. Sis losing an increasingly popular educational approach - ideal for many in their assumptions. What is closeness parenting? We invite you to read.

Upbringing in bstickiness, that is, attachment and openness

To answer a question, what is closeness parenting, one should reach the source - that is, the transmission, where the term came from.

The concept of "closeness parenting" attachment parenting) comes from William Sears, an American pediatrician and author of The Book of Parenthood of Intimacy.

What exactly is closeness parenting? 

The foundation of this approach is attachment theory, i.e. building a safe and strong emotional bond between parents and children. Such a bond can arise when parents are open to the needs of their children. They listen and hear, observe their children and see their needs. Thanks to being brought up close, children have a better chance of proper development - both in the emotional, social and cognitive sphere.

Sounds nice in theory, doesn't it? But how to do it properly in everyday life? How to avoid exposing a child to a lack of emotional connection with his parents?

Inadequately implemented proximity education also carries the risk of switching to the so-called stress-free upbringing.

Closeness parenting a stress-free upbringing

What is not closeness parenting?

• Closeness education has nothing to do with letting go of everything and pampering your baby. Closeness is being mindful of one another. It is a cooperation between a parent and a child, which helps to tighten and create a natural bond, helping to properly shape the child's attitudes.
• Attachment parenting is not a strict model for raising a child, made up of rules that must be followed. It is a method full of flexibility and choices, thanks to which it is easier to properly develop emotions.
• Closeness is not difficult, it is even comfortable. Developing a close emotional bond with a child is a comfort, thanks to which parenting becomes more pleasant and it is easier to overcome everyday difficulties. A close relationship with a child based on trust, tenderness, communication and mutual tenderness will pay off throughout life, giving a sense of satisfaction and mutual happiness.

Why is it difficult to set limits for children?

It is worth taking a closer look at the causes of this phenomenon. What makes it difficult for us to name and set boundaries for children? 

It is worth recalling at this point upbringing style, common in Poland in the 70's, 80's and early 90's. At that time, parents had no difficulty setting limits to their children. Often, however, this was done without respecting the dignity of the child and without much regard for his needs, mainly with the use of an endless list of do's and don'ts. Dry questions about what was at school were accompanied by a lack of conversations about emotions and feelings, because for many adults in those days, these were uncomfortable, unnecessary and embarrassing conversations. As a result, children often felt a lack of emotional connection with their parents.

Tedious work to change the approach

Therefore, having such a pattern of upbringing style, it is hardly surprising that setting wise boundaries and following the child, teaching them what emotions are, why they are important and how to talk about them, it can be quite difficult for many parents today. However, it is worth working on changing the approach to upbringing, focusing on the child's welfare. Let us make sure that children cannot complain about the lack of emotional connection with us - their parents. Let us learn to build an empathetic and more emotional generation together.

When we join the emotions yet listening to each other, tenderness and mutual love, we will come to the point where closeness parenting can be born. In it, the child will find common rules, acceptance, safety and disinterested love of the parent - that is, all that what is closeness parenting.